The greatest power is self-control over our own minds.
I'll begin by saying that one of the greatest powers we can adopt as human beings is self control, to be able to focus and control our minds and energy, to be detached from everything. To be able to navigate your emotions, to not be overjoyed during the good times and not be too depressed during the bad times.
Detachment is not that you own nothing, it is that nothing owns you. That's the real power and strength. It is not throwing everything away, it is to be able to have everything but not letting them control you and your emotions. This way our minds can be unaffected and detached.
Self-control, like many other things, is much easier said than done. If we are aware of our thoughts and reactions on a daily basis, it is very obvious that we are all easily affected and attached to the things around us. We have fallen into a state where we often attach to and are affected by mundane pleasures, materialistic possessions, opinions and judgments of others and validation from others. Depending on whether or not we get those things, we let that affect our minds and mental state. This mindfulness blog is meant for introspection and awareness of the self in order to create positive change, so if we could be honest with ourselves and ask ourselves how much we are affected by people and their judgments, opinions, characteristics and habits. Also how much we are attached to mundanes desires, pleasures and materialism. These are the two main factors that can easily cloud our peace of mind, at least for me.
Judgements, Opinions, Characteristics and Habits of Others.
To be affected by what another person says or does is the quickest way we could throw away our own peace. If there is one thing in this world we truly have the most control of, it is what goes on inside our minds and hearts. Are we really willing to give that away simply due to the action or word of another? Is it really that easy to take something that is so precious to us, our peace? In a lot of cases, it is, although I hope this won't be the case for us forever.
In a society that constantly tells us that we need to do better, be better, feel better and look better, it is no wonder why we seek validation and praise so often. We crave the feeling of feeling wanted/needed, to be approved and to be 'liked'. It is understandable why it is so easy for another's words or actions to tear us down. As much as we hate to admit it, we are a fragile generation. Deep down we all know and feel this, I am fragile and so are most, if not, all of us. In this way, we have given up our peace and happiness and put it in the hands of others. We seek happiness and peace through others, when the truth is, it is only us who can give it to ourselves.
Mundane Desires, Pleasures and Materialism.
If the pressure of pleasing people and the burden of others words and actions weren't heavy enough, our hearts and minds are also being trapped and lost in the mundane world that has been created in front of us. We are slowly losing what is important, ourselves. We are losing ourselves to the world, to our desires and to the views the we have been given. We have been brought up being taught that in order to be successful, we must be rich, we must have status, we must be beautiful, we must have all the latest and most expensive things and so on. The truth is, success is only in the eyes of the beholder. Success only comes when one is at peace, truly content and grateful for their lives.
If we are honest with ourselves, I'm sure all of us can say we have fell to our desires for mundane pleasure. Chasing down materialistic possessions to feel a sense of achievement, power or status. That way when people see us, they will know we are "successful".
Through this we have slowly lost what it means to be human, what is truly important to us and our lives. We lack love, empathy and care for those around us as we are blinded by what we are chasing. We are willing to walk all over anyone to get what we want, and when we do get what we want, we can't guarantee we will even be truly happy, as true happiness does not lie in materialism. Can we see the issue?
As I sit here writing this blog, there are things in my mind that I allow to unsettle me. However, writing this has brought my attention to it, and I hope reading this can bring your attention to it too. As with everything else, change can only come when we are first aware of it. I am no success story, I am not here to tell you that I am completely detached and unaffected by mundane desires and peoples words and judgements. I am still learning the power of self-control, to have a clearer mind and a peaceful heart.
I hope by reading this, we can all work together to be truly freed from the current societal views. I hope that we can work to truly see the real importance of life, the people around us, the deep and truthful connections, real human connections. I hope we can all start to see, feel and give more love when we speak with and act towards other people, for that is what is truly important. No amount of money, power or status can buy or give you real human love and connection. We have become much too distant, so much so that we can be in the same room and still feel lonely. Physical presence means nothing without the heart. I hope we can all appreciate the people around us more than we appreciate the big house or new car, as the big house and new car won't stop us from the pain of wasted time when the loved one leaves us. Show love, show kindness and show care to everyone around us, as each life is worth more than money can ever buy. The happiness of another is more fulfilling than any status that can be given.
I hope as we work together on this journey as a society, our intentions become pure. If we understand our own intentions, then we need not to be affected by others judgements and opinions. If our heart becomes pure, and we live with love first, than words will not affect us. We will accept that not everyone will understand yet. Instead of looking down upon them, let's show them and hope that they can one day find the courage to live with love first. True happiness and peace does not need approval. May we all live with love.
"One who knows himself is never disturbed by what others think about him." - Buddha